when it snows inside

do you want to know how much money 15 minutes is worth?

$8.99.


that's exactly how long it took sadie my rockin' rottweiler to rip to shreds the shrieking stuffed monkey she got from santa paws. (for all you believers out there, stop reading. "santa paws" is really me. sorry to burst that bubble.)

for a toy at such a large price, i was hoping that it could last a day. i am nothing if not realistic. it seemed to have good stitching. no raised plastic eyes that will provide an easy access to the fuzz within. no long limbs for a tug-o-war with her sister chloe.

it's not like sadie's vicious or anything. she loves her toys and will carry them around the house with her from room to room, wherever she goes. and like her daddy, she will leave them in the oddest places. (which is why there is a camel leg on top of the stove as i write this.)

it's the squeaker, man. she did it all for the squeaker. she's got to have it. her big brown eyes get HUGE when she hears it. it's the puppy version of crack.

man, when she gets her mouth on it, look out. she'll shake it just to make it squeal. toss it in the air. whip it back and forth just to make it pay for her addiction to it. all the while her big butt is wiggling.

and if you happen to be near her, she'll share her toy by bringing it to your leg and saying, come on, man take a hit. but her eyes seriously say, "this shit is mine, man. remember the first hit is free. the second one, man, you gots to pay."

after politely declining her offer for a hit, she'll go back to swinging and tossing and wiggling. then she gets her high. she reaches the holy grail for puppies.

she's got fuzz.

yup, she picks a hole smaller than the size of donald rumsfeld's heart but it is big enough for what she needs.

sadie and chloe will then be quiet for hours. taking turns removing enough stuffing out of the toy to make a sofa. until inside my house is as snowy as outside. just to get to the squeaker.

she did it all for the squeaker.